She knows

She knows...

She stares in the full length mirror, looking at herself. Tears starting to form, she calls herself fat. She’s a cow. She knows that it wouldn’t be so if she had more control. She knows that deep down, she’s not extraordinarily fat, but that she needs improvement. She knows she’d be happier with herself if she could lose three more pounds over the weekend. She knows if she worked out more, her legs wouldn’t jiggle. She knows that if she stopped eating so much her stomach wouldn’t hang over her jeans, looking gross. She knows all of this. She knows she wants to lose weight, fast. She knows that being skinny wouldn’t solve her problems. She knows that she’d look amazing in anything she wore, she knows she’d be envied. She wishes she could do this. She wishes she could be Pro-Ana. She wishes people would notice. She knows a lot, but she has so, so much to learn.